Yankee Doodle came to London,
Acted like a phoney,
Made an asshole of hisself
With bullshit and baloney!

When Chris Columbus discovered you,
You were a country for girls and boys named Sioux,
Arapahoe and Apache tribes;
They had no knowledge of good or evil vibes.
The bow and arrow against the gun

The east was stronger and so the West was won,
United States of America – it’s how you came to be.

The way you rule the world,
United States of A.
You get the things you want.
No one gets in your way.

Okay, so you ain’t so good at art,
Okay, creatively, you ain’t quite so smart,
But then destructively, you’re the tops:
Your violent movies are always in the shops.

But in the world of reality,
We understand that you govern peacefully,
So you’ll inherit the universe

And go from Bad to worse!

The way you rule the world,
United States of A.

You’ve got the loudest voice,
You always get your say

The Atlantic is wide,
It’s the ebb of the tide
And the waves are so high
We can barely wave goodbye.

No more do “Indians” puff their pipes:
They paint their noses and cheeks with stars and stripes!
One changes face if one’s born a black son,
Like Michael Jackson.

Way you rule the world,
United States of A.
You get the things you want.
No one gets in your way.

Oooooo, the Camptown Ladies, they wear wigs,
Doo-dah, doo-dah,
They look like horses and they smell like pigs,
Oh, me-moo-mah-

May your days be merry and bright
And may all your Presidents be white.